Maybe you don't care

[retrononomusic]

Hello,

I'm french and I would like some help to review this song in english.

I couldn't upload it so here it is on youtube http://youtu.be/1BzMouW3xFM

It was all done using an ipad and garageband in order to concentrate on the melody and the lyrics.

Thanks by advance,

Nono.

[Moon]

Hi Nono. Just a tip: if you click on the Additional Options while typing in a message, you should be able to upload your song here.

Regards,

Moon

[elwoodblues91]

Hi Nono & welcome to the forum,it's nice to see a new K-M member.

The 80's new wave style is interesting & I really like the drum track.The vocals sit well in the mix.One bit of criticism though...I think the e.piano track could be increased in volume a bit,so it is more present in the tune.

Pretty impressive,coming from an iPad!


Cheers,

-Thom

[Moon]

Wow... nice song! Great work with the vocals.

Personally, I think the mix is a bit too gently and to polite.

Don't get me wrong, you have a great song here but I'm missing something: this song has the potential to rock and it should rock more. So... don't hold back on those guitars and bass: try to EQ the instrument tracks leaving room for the vocals, and than make them louder. Getting some (extra) reverb and compression on some tracks may give the song some more energy.

Love to hear a next version of this one !

Oh... wait a minute... this was done with an I-pad !!! Oooops... amazing !!! I'm wondering what you could do with a full featured DAW on a PC 

Moon

[folderol]

Very enjoyable song. I get the feeling that something is missing, but can't quite think what it is.

[retrononomusic]

Thanks for listening, you guys are really nice! )

Actually, this version is a draft I've done while on a plane (I've added the vocals then) and I'm looking for a new band to give life to it. I wish I could do more with the mix, but the GarageBand version of the Ipad is somewhat limited. But I take your advice about giving it more energy! I'l keep you informed.

What do you think of the lyrics? Is it not too uncommon and understandable?

PS : About the issue with the upload, it's my connection that is not working properly.

[Moon]

What do you think of the lyrics? Is it not too uncommon and understandable?

You're slight accent is giving it a likeable feel, the lyrics are fine and by no mean uncommon. It's fine !

Moon

[Oren]

The song, as it is, is perfect. Can we assume this style reflects your tastes and the mood of your music? Beautiful!

If more variation in the drums and more changes in the bass track were added, it would add interest for your listeners, but this is not at all necessary. Good song!

[retrononomusic]

Thank you for your kind words.

I have these 2 songs listened by many people now, and the feedback I got is that it might be a lot better if it were sung by someone else, with a stronger voice. Would it really make a difference?

[Moon]

Well... It depends what you want to do with your music.

My honest straight-forward-opinion: You're a good singer, you're a great songwriter ('great' maening better than 'good'  ).

If you can team up with a stronger singer, that collaboration should be able to open more doors...

By the way: it's much easier to find a good singer than founding a good song writer. 

Moon

[MarioD]

I'm late to the party but I'm glad that I came!

I agree with everything that has already been said.  That is with a little punch, bringing up the EP, etc it would make a very good song into one great song.

PS - I really liked your lyrics and vocals.